I'm Tired

I am tired. Really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really tired.

I mean really tired.

Last night I went to bed at about 9:00. I fell asleep almost immediately and then woke up again at about 10:30. Then again at 11:00. Then again at 11:30. And so on and so forth.

My teeth were the reason, of course.

The pain has been constant over the last couple of days. At times it's been as close to excruciating as my limited pain receiving experience has gotten. It sucks. I've tried ibuprofen, acetaminophen, and whatever the hell Aleve is made out of. They all knock it back a little, but not enough. At least not enough for me to sleep much last night. I still have percocet from the first attempt at a Dental visit and I haven't cracked open the bottle yet. I don't want to, but tonight might be the night. I hope not.

I have done a little research into "sedation dentistry" and have decided to pin my hopes on it. I have a consultation at a place in Andover on Wednesday. My hope of hopes is that the doctor will hear my tale of gag-reflexive woah and say, as a light shines down from the heavens upon him making him look like he has a sort of halo over his head and maybe a pair of angel wings sprouting out of his back, "I'll take care of you. I'll fix your problems."

Let's hope so. Please please please please please please please please please please please.

I feel sleep deprived enough to have my judgment affected. On the first full day of my marriage to the beautiful and talented and amazing Jenny my wedding ring fell off in the shower. Each shower since then I have removed it and put it on the bathroom sink while showering, and then shortly (if not immediately) after getting out I have returned the ring to it's rightful place on my left hand.

Today I got out of the shower and was in a hurry because my sleep deprived self had been a little zombie-esque and took too much time getting into first gear this morning and was worried about making Jen late.

When I got to work I noticed that I didn't have my watch on. I stopped in the bathroom on the way back from dropping my lunch off in the kitchen and while washing my hands realized the ring wasn't there. It's still on the bathroom sink.

I feel terrible. That ring is a symbol of my feelings for my wife. It is a symbol of our marriage. It is a symbol of our love. And I have not had it on my finger since about 6:35 this morning. I won't have it on my finger until about 6:45 this evening. 12 hours with a ringless ring finger. I hate myself right now.

I've been tired enough today that I have been chugging caffeinated beverages since before 8:00am. My hands and my eyes are jittery. (Yes, my eyes. You read that correctly.) I am exhausted but too wired to worry about falling asleep. I just can't think 100% clearly. This sucks.

To top it off, the tooth pain has actually been different since I got up this morning. Generally it has just been a wicked powerful ache. Today, however it has added the bonus factor of being really sensitive. There are two teeth in question here, both on the upper left. One actually broke off at the gum line a few years ago. The root is still there and has been hurting a bit. The real problem is two teeth back from there where a cavity is forming around a filling. Today when I take a drink (of a caffeinated beverage) it hurts whenever the liquid touches that tooth. That's a new one for me today. My teeth have always been a little sensitive to cold (especially the broken tooth. I wonder why? Duh.) but it's never felt like this before. I can definitely live with it, it's just an added flipping of the dental bird.

Oh well.

Tonight I will be able to keep my shit together long enough to get home and eat some tacos with the wife and kids. Mmmmmmm tacos. I learned many years ago that for some retarded reason when I have a tooth ache it is much worse on an empty stomach. If I have a bite to eat the pain lessens. How do you spell psychosomatic? Over the last two or three days that has still been the case, it's just that the lessening doesn't last as long. Still, I can honestly look forward to tacos as a kind of homeopathic (how do you spell placebo?) remedy in this case. That's pretty cool. After the kids go to bed Jen and I are going to play around with some more programming in C#, but I don't think I'll be up for more than an hour or so. I want to try and go to bed a little early (again) and hopefully be too tired to notice that I'm in pain.

Tomorrow we have to get new school shoes for the kids. After that we're going to risk taking them to the movies to see the new Harry Potter flick. I will definitely be covering a certain boy's eyes through a certain Inferi scene. (note: I went to a Harry Potter glossary site to look up the proper spelling of inferi.) After that it's dinner with the newly moved to Haverhill Geyers. We missed out on seeing their new house last weekend, hopefully things will work out better this weekend. I know we had something on the agenda for Sunday too but I can't for the life of me remember what it was... was it Harry Potter? Had we planned on that for Sunday originally? I can't remember.

As for right now, I want to go home. Simple as that.