Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Jive Turkey

Two Years Ago Today

Honeymoon Day 1 by robj_1971
Honeymoon Day 1, a photo by robj_1971 on Flickr.

Two years ago today, my wife and I were on the first day of our honeymoon. We stayed at a bed and breakfast in Woodstock, VT and I am really hoping we'll have the opportunity to have a relaxing, do-nothing, trip back there some day soon.

Stanley Cup Finals Predictions

Well, here we are. The Conference Finals are over and it's time to pick the winner of hockey's biggest prize, The Stanley Cup.

I'm not biased at all this time. Nope.

After two rounds my prediction score was 8 correct, 4 incorrect. At that point I am already guaranteed a winning record, but you don't see me gloating at all. Nope.

In the Eastern Conference finals series between Boston and Tampa Bay, I picked Boston. Much to my shock and awe, I picked correctly. It took seven games, and game seven may have been the best hockey game I've ever witnessed (my brother was there... lucky stiff) and somehow my Bruins did it. They are Cup Finals bound for the first time since 1990. The last time they went to the finals I was just finishing up my second semester in music school. That was a loooooooong time ago.

In the Western Conference series between San Jose and Vancouver, I didn't do quite as well. I broke my A-1 rule and picked San Jose, and as almost always happens when I pick San Jose, I picked wrong. The Canucks won, and pretty easily at that.

So after round three, my record is a very happy 9-5. I am picking correctly at a 64% rate. I'll take it.

Now here is my prediction for the Stanley Cup Finals. Again, not biased at all. Nope.

The Vancouver Canucks vs the Boston Bruins: Oh glory, oh bliss, oh Bruins! You don't really think I am going to pick against my home town team, do you? Never! My pick is the Bruins. Always, the Bruins.

Now... having said that... I don't actually expect them to win. I think Vancouver is the better team. I think, as was the case in Boston's last two trips to the cup finals, the Western Conference is much tougher than the Eastern Conference and while the Eastern Conference playoffs were awesome, the disparity between the two halves of the league will be clearly on display in the finals.

If the Bruins defense can play out of it's mind, Tim "The Man" Thomas included, then the Bruins might be able to string together a bunch of 1-0 or 2-1 wins. If they play the way they played in game seven against Tampa Bay then they can beat anyone. I'm not saying the Bruins don't have a chance, they definitely do have a chance, I'm just saying that the Canucks have a better chance. While they are in no way the 1988 Edmonton Oilers, they are still a great team. I am hoping this one goes seven games and the Bruins did what they did against Tampa Bay and Montreal... I am hoping that they just find a way to win.

Having said that, if they can do what they did against Philadelphia and just steam roll over them and blow them out of the series in four games... I'll be happy with that too.

I do love a parade, ya know.


Monday, May 30, 2011

Night Out for Our 2nd Wedding Anniversary



The wife takes a pic of me as I take a pic of her.

Ahhhh nerd love.

I've Never Seen This Before

I still hate everything about the rock and roll hall of fame, right down the very idea of it. However, I've never seen this before, so I will put up with the offensiveness of the concept in order to hear Cream playing together.

Two Years Ago Today

IMGP6990 by robj_1971
IMGP6990, a photo by robj_1971 on Flickr.

Best Day Ever!

Two Years

Two years ago today I married the woman of my dreams.

It was the happiest day of my life and it has led to the happiest two years of my life.

It just keeps getting better and better. Talk about a smart move on my part.

Happy Anniversary, Jen. I love you so much.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Toasting Marshmallows


Do you live in a heavy mosquito area? What do you do to keep them away? I just got swarmed.


When I was in high school I had a job mowing lawns. Why then is it that today when I mow 2/3 of our little yard I feel like ima fixin to die?

Wild kingdom update: I saw a garter snake in the front yard today.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

I Almost Missed This

In case you, like me, missed this particular piece of Boston sports news...

Last night the Red Sox won and the Yankees lost. That moves the Red Sox into first place all by their lonesome. After that horrendous start they had in early April, it has only taken them until May 27th to move into 1st in the American League East.

Damn, was last night a good night for Boston sports, or what?!

Veteran's Field

Veteran's field in Salem, NH.


I watched the whole game last night but I still don't believe it.

Boston is in the finals.

Friday, May 27, 2011


The Bruins did it! They proved me wrong!

The Bruins beat Tampa Bay 1-0 in game seven of the Eastern Conference Finals. Next stop is the Stanley Cup Finals against the Vancouver Canucks. We are four wins away from the hockey promised land. Only two teams left and one of them is my home town team!

I am so happy right now!



ARGH!! I can't stand it anymore! Play the game right now! WIN, BRUINS! WIN!!

I want the Stanley Cup Finals! You want the Stanley Cup Finals! All of the masses of people who read this ridiculous page want the Stanley Cup Finals (even if they don't realize it... all one or two of them)!

Screw Too Many Men on the Ice!
Screw Wayne Gretzky and his little Mark Messier too!
Screw the entire 2009-10 Philadelphia Flyers Organization!
Screw that fan that Milbury smacked around with his own shoe!
Screw Ulf Samuelsson!
Screw Claude Lemieux!
Screw Every Montreal Canadiens Team Ever!
Screw Bill Buckner!
Screw Bucky Dent!
Screw Aaron Boone!
Screw Bob Gibson!
Screw Mookie Wilson!
Screw Pete Rose!
Screw Ray Knight!
Screw Stan Musial!
Screw Magic Johnson!
Screw Kareem Abdul Jabaar! (did I spell that right?)
Screw Eli Manning!
Screw William "The Refrigerator" Perry!
Screw the Super Bowl Shuffle!
Screw Brett Favre!



The Bruins are going to win tonight's game seven! There, I said it! My Cautious Optimism is in full overdrive! I WANT THE STANLEY CUP FINALS! The hell with a lifetime of horrible, atrocious, miserable post season collapses by every Boston sports team! Tonight the Bruins stand tall! Tonight the Bruins WIN GAME SEVEN!

Redemption! Salvation! HOPE! OPTIMISM! All things that are foreign to Boston sports fans! All things that are ALIVE AND WELL!



Game seven tonight. I'm going to watch. I'm going to stress out. I'm going to panic. I still don't think they are going to win. It's just a feeling. I can't explain it. Maybe it's just the Red Sox fan trying to insulate himself from another painful sports disappointment.


They have to find a way. They have to prove me wrong. The last two times they went to the Stanley Cup finals happened to coincide with a certain Edmonton Oiler's dynasty, even though the last time was against a Gretzky-free Oilers team. The Bruins actually won a game in that series, unlike the previous trip when the Gretzky-full Oilers swept them. The last time they made it to the third round they had the misfortune of running against a Penguins team who was on their way to the cup as well. (I think... I might have to double check that particular factoid... didn't the Penguins win it in 1992?)

It's been so long since the Bruins had a shot. They can't blow it now. They must beat Tampa Bay tonight. They must play like their lives depend on it, not just their season. We, the Bruins Nation, need them to win tonight. It's not a question of wanting it, we need it.

In an attempt to distract myself from the impending hockey doom, let me just state publicly that the Red Sox have scored more than 10 runs in each of their last two games, blowing out the Indians on Wednesday, and the Tigers on Thursday. They still trail the Yankees in the division, but only by 0.003 percentage points. A win tonight coupled with a Yankees loss puts us all alone in first place. That would make me happy. Not as happy as a Bruins win tonight (I would gladly trade a Red Sox win tonight for a Bruins win tonight), but pretty happy.

This weekend is Memorial Day weekend. I started an on-call period last night at 5:30. It lasts until 9:00am on Tuesday. This wonderful holiday weekend that marks the symbolic beginning of Summer will pretty much be a bust for me. The Bruins just can't lose and make it worse. They just can't.

Go Bruins!
Prove me wrong!
Go Bruins!

Thursday, May 26, 2011


Just a reminder to all of my dearly adored loyal readers (reader), I really really really really really hate being on call.

Especially when it lasts for all or part of six days, including a three day holiday weekend.

That is all.


Is blogger down again? I can't post to the other page right now.

Is this going to happen every time I go to my step daughter's softball games?

Prove Me Wrong

In game five the Bruins didn't play well. In game six they continued to not play well. The series is tied at three games all and game seven is Friday.

I hope Vancouver kicks Tampa Bay's ass in the finals.

I'm not off the bandwagon, but the Bruins are not winning game seven. There, I said it. The Bruins season ends on Friday night.

Prove me wrong, Bruins.

They did manage a power play goal last night but over all the power play was embarrassing again. The penalty kill, which normal is a strong point for us, was awful as well as it was scored on three times. Kaberle wasn't good again. Boychuck was terrible. The top line finally broke through with Lucic scoring once and Krejci netting himself a hat trick. The other three lines were pretty much not there.

Tampa Bay scored in the first minute again. That's three times. Yes we've won two of those games, but can we stop doing that please? Tampa Bay was just better than us all around... again. Let me say this again: Three Power Play Goals.

It was terrible to watch. The worst part was that in the last five minutes or so we totally dominated. Where the hell was that kind of play during the first 55 minutes of the game? It was sad to watch, really. There is no way the Bruins are coming back from this in game seven. The collapse is not as dramatic as it was last year, but it's still going to suck.

Prove me wrong, Bruins. Please, prove me wrong.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011


Can you see the guy behind me? He was driving while reading today's sales figures or something.

They say texting and driving is bad, but I think doing paperwork while driving might be worse.

(Obviously I was stopped at a light when I took this)


Would it make me wicked lame if I ended up getting an ulcer due to the stress of following the Bruins in the playoffs this year?

Yeah, probably... but I think it might happen anyway.

Game six. Tonight. Must win. Must Win.

My step son has a baseball game that won't end before the Bruins start tonight so I am going to miss some of the first period. That might be for the best. I don't expect to enjoy watching tonight's game. I expect to be way too stressed out to have fun. Maybe if they go up 10-0 in the first period i might relax a little bit... a little bit. Probably not though. There is no such thing as a safe lead when a team with the choking pedigree of the Bruins plays a team with the offensive skills of the Lightning. The closest Boston can come to having a safe lead is if they are up by some number of goals when the clock runs out on the third period. In other words, if there is still game to be played, the lead is not safe. Ever.

Out in the Western Conference the third round came to an end last night. Vancouver eliminated San Jose in double overtime in game five. I was really rooting for San Jose last night. Not so much because I picked them to win (NEVER PICK SAN JOSE TO WIN, you moron) but because I wanted them to extend the series. I was hoping they would go to seven games and beat the holy hell out of each other. Ryan Kesler left the game in the second period with an apparent leg injury. I got really excited. If he's out and we win our series and face Vancouver they will be that much easier to beat! I thought the same in game four when Joe Thornton went out for San Jose. Kill each other, you Western Conference Finalists. Beat each other to a pair of collective pulps! Make it easier on the team that comes out of the East... assuming it's the Bruins. Should the Bruins blow their series lead and not get to the finals I want Vancouver to utterly destroy Tampa Bay... but let's not get to down yet... Cautious Optimism is the key for us Bruins fans, still.

So what did injured Ryan Kesler do after leaving the game in the second period? Oh nothing, he just came back and scored the game tying goal in the final seconds of the third period, forcing the overtime where the Canucks eventually won. Dumb, stupid, ridiculously tough hockey player. Jerk.

Back to the Bruins. It's only 9:00am hear in the Eastern Time zone, and already I am feeling the stress. This is nuts. I feel ridiculous. Part of me is just plain embarrassed. Another part of me is freaking out, thinking START THE DAMN GAME NOW RIGHT NOW SCREW TELEVISION PLAY THE GAME NOW RIGHT NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!

You see my internal struggle, I'm sure.

Anyway... no stupid penalties (looking at you Marchand and Seguin and yes even you Chara). No stupid turnovers (still, eternally looking at you Kaberle). No defensive breakdowns (looking at you Boychuck). Cut down on those odd man rushes. Give Tim Thomas all the help you can. Thomas, cover up those rebounds and limit their second chances. If you have to play like a god on Earth again then the defense is letting you down. Hopefully you won't have to play like a god on Earth, but if you do need to, it would be nice if you could do it once again. We all know you can. You are The Man after all. Krejci/Lucic/Hornton line, play like we all know you can. Play like the first line should. Bergeron... just keep doing what you're doing. You're the best skater on the ice for us in every situation and you make it look easy. Just keep plugging along.

Most of all, and I can't stress this enough...


Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!
Go Bruins!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Stormy Weather

Our first wicked thunderstorm in the new house. Hang on tight trees. Hang in there power lines.

Cautious Optimism


The Bruins played pretty crappy last night and still managed to pull out a 3-1 win over Tampa Bay in game five of the Eastern Conference Finals. Boston now takes a three games to two lead.

How did it happen? This is Boston we're talking about. How can we be this close to another series win? Well, Tim Thomas is The Man. That's a big part of it, but shouldn't they have fallen apart by now? They always do. Again, this is Boston we're talking about.

Game six is tomorrow in Tampa Bay. While the math dictates that we have two chances to win one game, I think in this instance math can kiss my ass. We absolutely must win game six. If we let the Lightning stay alive then we are just inviting the collapse we all fear. They are down (slightly, let's be honest, Tampa Bay played very well last night) so let's kick them while they are down.

Cautious Optimism is the key. Don't think about anything else besides game six. Focus! Take your Ritalin! Win Game Six!


Monday, May 23, 2011

Alarm Coaster



We just invented words. I came up with "cute-tastic" and Jen came up with "pain-in-ass-tastic."


I haven't mentioned it yet, but I can't put it off any longer.

Damn, did the Bruins suck on Saturday.

Now, they had a lot going against them. You see, the Boston Bruins are generally jinxed for all afternoon games, but especially Saturday games, and extra-especially nationally televised Saturday afternoon games. History was very much against them in game four.

Having said that, boy did they ever suck. The first period was a thing of beauty, leading to a 3-0 lead for the Bruins and a pulled goalie for the Lightning. If only it had ended after the first, because the Bruins played as if that were the case. They failed to show up in the second and third periods and blew their 3-0 lead in startling fashion. Now the series is tied at two games a piece.

Game five is tonight. It is worth noting that it is not a nationally televised afternoon game, so the Bruins are not starting with two strikes against them. That's good. Also good is that rumor has it that Dwayne Roloson will be starting for Tampa Bay. Given the sieve like manner of his first period play in game four, I take that as good news.

Let's just hope the B's show up for three periods tonight instead of just one. It's a best of three series now, and I am still Cautiously Optimistic that we can kick Tampa Bay's ass.

As for the Red Sox, taking two out of three from the Cubs has put the Sox a half game out of first place in the American League East. I would like to thank the Yankees and the Devils Rays for not running away with things while the Red Sox were sucking up a storm to start the season. That's why were have been able to get back to relevance. May the winning continue for our home town team. Of course, our next series is in Cleveland against the team with the best record in the majors. That might make things difficult, although I could sure go for some revenge for the way they kicked our ass the first week of the season.

Go Bruins!
Go Red Sox!
Go Bruins!

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Fish Food

YouTube Video


When is the weather going to be nice?

When are the Bruins going to be consistent?

When are the Red Sox going to get their starters back?

When am I going to be able to help?

When am I ever going to be okay with going a full calendar day without posting here.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Raise your hand if you got raptured...


There is so much dandelion fluff floating through the air in our neighborhood that it looks like it's snowing.

I knew that damn winter would find a way to stick around!

Friday, May 20, 2011

@ the Movies with the Mrs


Hockey Stress

The last time the Bruins made it this far into the playoffs I was 21 years old and much less of a hockey fan than I am today. I followed the game enough to know that they were in round three, but not enough to actually watch anything.

I have never actively rooted for a team that has made it out of the second round of the playoffs. Back in '99 (wasn't it?) I went to a couple of second round games against Buffalo. It was an electric atmosphere in which I got so wrapped up in every play that I thought I was going to die of a heart attack on countless occasions. I twice followed the Lowell Lock Monsters into the second round of the AHL playoffs. The first time was in the team's second season. When the playoffs started my brother and I made a deal that if they made it to round 2 we'd both buy replica jerseys. I still have that shirt (note: look at my profile picture and see the replica game jersey in question). The second time was during the NHL lock out when Lowell had Eric Staal, Cam Ward, and a bunch of other current regular NHL players.

Seeing round two games is stressful. Watching them on TV is just as stressful, you just have fewer people yelling at the game with you. But it is still just the second round.

This year, the second round is history. We're in the third round. The Eastern Conference Finals. The stress level is so high I am positive I am going to have a heart attack or a stroke or something at any moment. I had to preemptively apologize to my family yesterday for the yelling at the TV I was bound to be doing that would surely wake them all up (stupid 8:10 Versus starting time). My heart was pounding, my stomach was clenching... and we were playing with the lead!

Now here we are. Three games in the books and the Bruins have beaten Tampa Bay with a huge offensive burst in game two, and a fantastic defensive clamp down in game three. Boston leads the series two games to one. Game four is tomorrow afternoon, again in Tampa Bay. At least the 1:30 start time will allow me to yell like an idiot without waking anyone up.

The Bruins are two wins away from the Stanley Cup finals. I refuse to be anything more than cautiously optimistic. At times I find myself dwelling on the negative like a good Boston sports fan should.

To clarify...

Yes, the Red Sox have won two World Series over the last decade. The Patriots have won three Super Bowl titles in that time frame. The Celtics have also won a championship recently. That allows the tortured, suffering Boston sports fan some amount of relaxation, but the truth is, anyone who reached adulthood prior to the 2004 is/was/and ever shall be a victim of the 86 year World Series drought. I will not refer to it as a curse, I will refer to it as pain and suffering. We kept coming so close to the prize and then we'd have it snatched away. Patriots fans had 40 years worth of terrible teams to suffer through. The Celtics are the most decorated team in the history of the NBA, but once the Bird/McHale/Parrish years ended they were just plain awful. The Bruins were the toast of the town in the 70's with their two cups and a few other finals appearances, but the Jacobs years stole the thunder away. They had good teams during Bourque and Neely's prime, but too often they were built to make the playoffs and then fail. The result is the current state of 19 years without a third round appearance and 21 years without a Stanley Cup finals appearance and 39 years without a Stanley Cup Championship.

Yes, we have had it good over the last 10 years, but the underlying pain and suffering has not gone away. Look at the way the fans have reacted to the Red Sox over the last year and a half. Look at the way they had been reacting to the Bruins prior to 2008. The aging Celtics may be on the cusp of putting their fans through a similar period. All of that pales to the horror that was the 86 years of futility for the Red Sox. Those 86 years define us as sports fans. We focus on the negative because for most of our lives the negative was all we had.

So when I find myself getting furious with the Bruins power play, or certain defensemen backing up past the face off circles when Steven Freakin' Stamkos is bearing down on them (looking at you Boychuck) or when a moronic turn over results in a Tampa Bay goal (looking at you Kaberle) I do in fact find it comforting. I feel safe and secure in my negativity because if I get overly positive and they lose it will hurt that much more. If you start getting pumped because they are one strike away from beating the Mets and clinching the World Series and your best relief pitcher is on the mound then it hurts that much more when the ball dribbles through Buckner's legs.

Do you see what I mean?

Cautious optimism is the best I was willing to give the 2004 Red Sox against the Cardinals. It will be the best I can give the Bruins against Tampa Bay. I'm not even going to acknowledge the fact that Boston is currently six wins away from the Cup. Okay, so I did just acknowledge it, but that's all you're going to get. No thoughts of who is going to advance out of the Western Conference. No thoughts of parades and duck boats and any of that. No thoughts of Conn Smythe trophies. Only thoughts of get-that-damn-power-play working and thoughts of holy-shit-Lecavalier/St. Louis/Stamkos/Gagne-are-awesome-how-can-we-ever-stop-them and is-Lucic-ever-going-to-score-again and Bergeron-came-back-but-if-he-takes-another-head-hit-it-could-all-be-over.

I don't want to be negative. It just comes natural to us Boston sports fans. Cautious Optimism (from now on I will give that phrase proper noun status) is all I am willing to give.

Wow... that post rambled.

What I wanted to say really is:

The Bruins won game three.
The Bruins lead 2-1.

Why the Bruins Rule

Three reasons why the Bruins Rule:

The Loch Ness Monster. Big Foot. Tampa Bay Lightning Fans.

For your courtesy Tampa Fans, there will be shuffleboard during the second intermission.

In Tampa, a "hip check" usually comes from your insurance.

Mario Bros in the Woods

The kids are mildly obsessed with The new Wii and DS versions of Mario Bros. They are playing it all the time.

This morning at about 5:00 I could have sworn I heard Mario being played on the DS. I could hear the sound of Mario getting a coin.

At least I thought I could.

I listened closely for a while and determined that it was not Mario Bros, it was a bird singing in the back yard. It sounded so similar. Weird.

I also had a dream where all of the trees in my old neighborhood fell down on everyone's houses, all at the same time. Fortunately I'm not a prophet.


Thursday, May 19, 2011

One Very Big Day

Today is a big day. Something very important happens today.

Today is my step-daughter's 10th birthday.

Welcome to Double Digits!

10 years old. Wow. It's hard to believe. Hell, it's hard to believe for me and I've only been in the picture since she was six. I can't even imagine how Jen is feeling. She's growing up so fast.

So fast that I suddenly have an intense dislike of all 10 year old boys.

Happy Birthday, Miss 10 years old. I hope you have a great day today, and I can't wait for that party this weekend!

Ten Years Old!

In other unrelated and much less important news, The Bruins play game three of their Eastern Conference Finals series tonight in Tampa Bay. In case you are curious, I just checked Ticketmaster and was not surprised to see that there are still tickets remaining and in a couple of cases you can still buy two seats next to each other. The word on the street is that we will know if Patrice Bergeron is going to play tonight after the morning skate. Fingers crossed for Bergy's return.

In other other unrelated and much less important news, The Red Sox now have two of their five starters on the disabled list, but they managed to win their fifth game in a row last night, 1-0 over Detroit. Has the corner been turned? Are there happy baseball days ahead? I really hope so because having a crappy Red Sox team just plain sucks.

Happy Birthday to my step-daughter.
Go Bruins!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011


Neon Tetras, three of them.

Too Much Excitement

So that Bruins game was pretty exciting, huh? Five goals in the second period and then almost blowing the big lead in the third? My poor heart can't take it.

Tyler Seguin continued his coming out party by doubling his game one production with two goals and two assists. Bruins Nation whipping boy Michael Ryder scored two goals as well. Even Dennis Wideman Tomas Kaberle played well. Most surprising of all, the powerless power play scored twice!

...and they gave up five goals for the second game in a row. [gulp]

The series is tied at a game apiece heading down to Tampa Bay for game three on Thursday. On the radio this morning, Peter Chiarelli let slip that Patrice Bergeron participated in contact drills yesterday. That's a very good sign that he'll be back in the line up for game three.

On a totally unrelated note, the Red Sox still have not announced a make up date for last night's rain out. They need to tell me when my tickets will be honored. Get on that, will ya Red Sox?

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

13 seconds

Here we see a depressed kitty who can't believe the Bruins are losing after only 13 seconds.


So we have a Cardinal living in out neighborhood. I've been trying to get a picture but the damn bird isn't cooperating.

Today when Jen and I got home from visiting my mother in the hospital we pulled into the driveway and the Cardinal flew onto the driver's door side mirror! He sat there for a solid two seconds and then pissed off. He flew into a nearby tree. If you squint a little you still probably can't see him in this camera phone picture.

Still... It was wicked cool.

Red Sox Luck

Jen and I had Red Sox tickets tonight but due to the crappy weather we had decided to skip it. We tried selling the tickets but couldn't find a buyer on craigslist.

The Red Sox sympathized with our plight. They postponed the game due to the rain. So now we will be able to go to the make up game.

Thanks, Red Sox!

I'm Not Crazy

I often feel like I might be crazy. Today, I'm not crazy. It kinda sucks, but I'm not crazy.

We're not going to Fenway tonight. It's cold. It's raining. Wakefield is pitching. We're going to give this one a miss. We are, however, going to visit my mother in Mass General. She was checked in for a chemo treatment and we're going to put our afternoon off to good use.

I decided to take Bob and Doug Mackenzie's Strange Brew DVD for a spin. Can you believe that Max von Sydow was in that flick? Nope, neither can I.

Monday, May 16, 2011

The Rush Moving Pictures blu ray is playing in the living room as we speak. Now all we need is a 5.1 surround sound system.



Random bunny sighting outside of Jen's office.

Back to It

Let me preface this one by saying emphatically that I am ridiculously out of shape. Okay? We know that, right? I don't have to qualify anything else in the post now that we know that I am in fact, a fat ass.


Oh the pain! The Pain! My step-daughter's mini-birthday party/family cookout was a hit on Saturday and I am still paying for it. Jen did some major cleaning around the house on Friday before I got home from work. She did great. On Saturday morning she went out to do all of the shopping and I stayed home to finish the cleaning. That included sweeping and mopping all of the floors and mowing the lawn. My legs may never be the same. I did the lawn first and even before I was finished I was finding little things like, ya know, walking to be difficult. By the time the guests started arriving I had reached a point where getting out of a chair could cause me to shout in pain. Most of Sunday was just as bad. Today is better, but not that better. My legs, my back, my arms. PAIN!

Okay, on to less painful (slightly) things.

Why, oh why, are the Bruins and Lightning not playing game two tonight? Doesn't VS. generally have a Monday night game on their schedule? What? The? Hell? There are only two series left, and we have to add in extra days? I don't get it.

What I do get is that if the Bruins continue to play the way they played game one they are going to be golfing before the weekend is over. They sucked on Saturday. Just. Sucked. Patrice Bergeron may in fact be just as important a piece of the Bruins puzzle as I knew he was. I was afraid of that. Let's hope he comes back quickly.

In happier news, how about those Red Sox, huh? Finally up to .500 at twenty wins and twenty losses. What does it say about the American League East that we are still only three games out of first place? What does it say about the New York Yankees that they got swept by a last place team who can't get it's head out of it's ass (figuratively) like the Red Sox? I think it might be a clue that the Yankees Suck! hehe sorry, Boston fans have to work that chant in to everything they do. Jen and I are going to the game tomorrow against the Orioles and I expect to hear the Yankees Suck chant at least once.

Oh, did I mention we're Fenway bound tomorrow? (yes, I just did) Our tickets are in the non-tall people section which means Robbie's going to have to find a standing room spot, but expect a few pictures either way.

Finally, and far and away most importantly... in fact the only thing in this dumb post that actually is important... Mom's kidney is back to normal and she goes back onto the chemotherapy starting today. One step closer to beating the cancer! Beat that Cancer!


Sunday, May 15, 2011

Now All We Need Is...

Now all we need is fish.

Phrase of the Day

The phrase of the day is: Fish Tank.

The plan was to get a gold fish bowl for my step son, but like all such plans it escalated quickly.

We have a 10 gallon starter kit. If the rain ever slows down I'll go get it out of the car and we will set it up.

The Morning After

The party ended but the sleep over continues. The voices coming from down the hall went quiet at about 1:00am.

Now we are going to make pancakes.

Another good day.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

15 minutes left in game 1 between the Bruins and the Lightning and the Bruins are not winning. Nope. Tampa Bay scored three goals in 85 seconds and, while they have gotten one goal back, the Bruins haven't been able to catch up.

This is not the game one I was hoping for.

On the upside of the Boston sports Universe, the Red Sox have a six run lead over the Yankees in the ninth inning. We've got that going for us at least.


Cook out/kid's sleep over party/mini-birthday party for a certain soon to be 10 year old girl.

It was supposed to just be a little family thing, but after mowing the lawn and cleaning half the house and my lovely wife, Jen, getting all of the food and decorations and whatnot it feels like we're throwing a reception for that royal wedding they just had over there in the UK.

What a day! And it doesn't even start for a few more hours!

Friday, May 13, 2011


Oh what a relief. The Blogger outage nightmare is over for me. The missing post from yesterday has returned.

It's over.

Thanks Blogger... Now DON'T DO IT AGAIN!

NHL Conference Finals Predictions

Let's get this one in quick before Blogger craps out again...

Usually when I play this silly little game I do a half decent job of picking the first round winners and a terrible job picking the second round. This time it was different.

In the first round I got five out of eight. Not too bad, but not great either. How'd I do in round two?

The Washington Capitals vs The Tampa Bay Lightning: I saw the choke coming a mile away, but I may have underestimated the severity. The Lightning swept. The Mighty Capitals go home for the summer pretty early, once again. Pretty soon I'm going to have to start calling the San Jose Sharks the Capitals of the West, instead of the other way around. I picked this one correctly.

The Boston Bruins vs the Philadelphia Flyers: It does not erase last year's tragedy. Not at all. Not even a Stanley Cup championship will erase that memory... although it will make it a shit ton easier to deal with. The Bruins did what they failed to do last year and swept the Flyers, making them look really bad in the process. Q: How many Philly goalies does it take to win a 2nd round game? A: At least one more than they had against the Bruins. I picked this one correctly.

Over to the West...

The Vancouver Canucks vs the Nashville Predators: The Canucks have a very high choke quotient, but they were playing against the Ringo Starrs of the second round. Nashville was just happy to be there. They made a series of it, but Vancouver was just too much for them. I picked this one correctly.

The San Jose Sharks vs the Detroit Red Wings: The Sharks almost blew it. They almost blew it in 2010 Bruins fashion. Detroit just couldn't stretch their come back magic through game seven and after blowing the 3-0 series lead the Sharks hung on to win it in seven. The undisputed kings of NHL choke have somehow managed to survive once again. Maybe I should pass that choke crown over to the Caps after all.

So, after the first round I was 5-3. Now after two rounds I am 8-4. I believe that's the best I've ever done. (but who knows, my memory is crap)

Now we move on to the third round, starting as always with the Eastern Conference...

The Boston Bruins vs the Tampa Bay Lightning: Obviously I am picking Boston. Duh. I refuse to pick against my team. Having said that, I am somehow less worried about Tampa Bay than I was about Montreal or Philadelphia. That's not to say I'm not scared, because I am freakin' terrified. Have you seen the Lightning's forward lines? Holy Crap! And Dwayne Roloson, my former college classmate? (we were never in any of the same classes, but we did go to UMass Lowell at the same time for a semester or two. No I never met him.) How awesome is it that a goalie who is older than I am has his team in the Conference Finals. This series will be tough. The teams match up well. Go Bruins

The Vancouver Canucks vs the San Jose Sharks: Damn... which traditional choker do I pick to choke the least and win? I not so long ago promised myself that I would never pick San Jose again, but I think maybe the whammy is finally off of them. I think maybe this is the year they wait until the finals to choke. I am picking San Jose. Both teams survived blowing a 3 games to none lead in a series, Vancouver in the first round, San Jose in the second, but I think San Jose is going to put the lessons learned against the Red Wings to work for them and I think they are going to take this series and get themselves to the finals.

So, my picks for the cup finals are Boston and San Jose. Please, please please, oh mighty hockey gods, make this happen!

Go Bruins!

Are We Back?

Blogger went down for about 24 hours or so... are we back?

I have my dashboard, but I do not have yesterday's post... I tried autoposting from Posterous but it hasn't crossed over yet and it is showing in my edit posts list.

I still don't see yesterday's post anywhere. Regular readers (meaning me and... well... no one, as far as I can tell) know that I did in fact post yesterday. It was something about not having a Bruins or Red Sox game to watch and something else about not having posted any kid pictures dating back to February. That post was made, right? Right?

It better come back. It better.

I will take a shot at posting the drafts saved on my phone. Maybe they will post with yesterday's date. We'll see.


Oh no... what am I going to do?  This is the end of the world! 





I tried to post some pics of my step daughter's softball game last night at a little after 7:00pm and multiple attempts failed.

A little before 10:00pm I wrote up a quick post regarding my indecisiveness on who to root for in game seven of the NHL Western Conference Semi Final series between the Detroit Red Wings and San Jose Sharks.  Again, multiple attempts failed.

I just assumed it was the BlogPress app acting up again.

I tried to post them again this morning and again they failed.  Then I got to my computer and tried to open up the Blogger dashboard and got a Blogger is currently unavailable page.  I checked Blogger's blog, I checked twitter... They Have Been Down for at Least Twenty Hours!


What's worse than that?  All posts made after 7:37am Pacific time on May 11th have been temporarily removed.  I went to my actual page and to my horror my May 12th post is gone. 

You know what that means, right?  If a random reader pops onto my blog page right now they will think that I failed to post on May 12, 2011... WHICH BREAKS MY AT-LEASE-ONE-POST-A-DAY-SINCE-NOVEMBER-18-2008 STREAK!

The Blogger blog has stated that those posts are being returned as I write this... but what a scare that is for a complete and utter OCD blogging nerd like me.  Note that I'm writing this rant here on Posterous because I can autopost it to Blogger, and hopefully when it crosses the date and time will cross with it.  [fingers crossed on that]  Meaning, if they don't bring Blogger back up today, I might still show as never having missed a day.

Oh please, Mighty Google, give me my Blogger back so that I can satisfy my lame, nerd, OCD need to post at least once a day.  I beg you, Mighty Google.  I beg you!

ADDENDUM: The date and time do not cross over with the post. Blogger treats it as brand new. Oh well.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Wing and Sharks

I know this is looking way to far ahead, but....

Game seven between the Red Wings and Sharks is underway with the Sharks up 2-0 after one period.

Who do I want to win this one?

If it comes to it and the Bruins get past Tampa Bay and go to the cup finals (huge if) they would probably match up better against San Jose. Detroit kicked our ass this season. There is also the good story of Joe Thornton vs his old team.

So I should probably want San Jose to win.


If the Red Wings win tonight the Bruins will no longer be the last team to blow a 3-0 series lead. I can't understate the importance of that possibility. Also, how great would it to see an original six match up in the Stanley Cup finals. Coincidentally, Boston's last cup win was over an original six opponent, the New York Rangers.

So I should probably be rooting for Detroit.

But what I should really be doing is not looking ahead any further than Saturday's game one against Tampa Bay.

Cautious optimism is key. I don't want to mess with our Bruins Nation's karma.

Go Bruins!

ADDENDUM: Crap. This was written during the blogger downtime on 5/12 at roughly 10:00pm. I was hoping it would file with that time stamp. I wonder if I can edit it?

ADDENDUM ADDENDUM: Sweet! Under post options you have the option of setting a date and time for the post. >whew< Now I have a post that was written on 5/12 showing as written on 5/12. Now if my post from the morning of 5/12 would just be so kind as to come back.

What to Do?

The Red Sox are off tonight after losing again last night. The Bruins don't start their next series until Saturday night. Not that I watch the Celtics at all, but even the Celtics are done now.

What Boston sports team am I going to be able to complain about tomorrow morning? What to do?

Last night I went to my step daughter's elementary school chorus concert. It was Disney themed and the kids were great. My only beef is with the teacher. Most of the songs were sung along with pre-recorded music, as if it were karaoke. There were a couple of songs done to piano accompaniment, but only a couple. The last few songs were actually sung along with the actual movie soundtracks. The kids were getting tired and the voices were getting quiet and you could hear the Disney character's voice singing too. Huh? C'mon teacher, if you can't cut the piano part that's fine but find some one who can. Don't just stroll over to Newbury Comics on route 28 in Salem, NH (you're welcome) and pick up the movie soundtrack on CD and have the kids sing along. The kids aren't going to learn anything if they can just mumble along and let the CD carry the melody. Sheesh.

Speaking of my step daughter, her birthday is next week. There is a kids party this weekend and a family party next weekend. I will be taking pictures, but that reminds me that I still haven't posted the pics from my step son's birthday back in February to the other page. I haven't put up anything from Easter either. Slacker!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

The Waiting

The waiting continues, hockey fans.

We still wait for the start of the Eastern Conference Finals series between the slimy Tampa Bay Lightening and the heroic, majestic, demigodlike, Boston Bruins.

At least we know when the series is going to start now. Saturday. That marks a full week without a game for the Bruins, and a little more than a week for the Lightening. Game two will follow on Tuesday. What's with the extra day off?

The West is still going. Detroit has come back from down 3-0 to force a game seven. As we know (boy, do we know), only three teams have blown a 3-0 lead in NHL history. It seems awfully strange to me though, that after waiting 25 years between occurrences there have been two series in two rounds this year when a team was down 3-0 and forced a game seven. Is it easier now than it used to be, or are we just dealing with teams who can't help but choke. Probably the latter.

In other news, the Red Sox went into last night's game with a 17-18 record. They had a chance to finally get up to a .500 record. They were down one run in the ninth when Adrian Gonzales hit a homer to tie it. Off to extra innings we go...

And the Sox are still sub-.500 with a 17-19 record. They have played 22% of the season and still they are mired in mediocrity. I think it's time for us to stop saying, "its early, they can fix this" and just accept that despite the enormous payroll and the line up full of superstars... the Red Sox just sort of suck this year.

Go Bruins!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011



We come here all the time and yet somehow Foursquare Mayorship continues to elude me.


File this one under, WTF?

It happened at 12:30am. It was really annoying. I wanted to try to sleep through it, but it was bad enough that I knew that was not going to happen so I took care of it.

It happened again at a little before 6:00am. Again? This time I did manage to go to sleep again, but only for a few minutes as the alarm is set for 6:00.

What am I talking about, you ask?

Hiccups. Bloody hiccups that not once but twice woke me up from a dead sleep.

Hiccups, for crying out loud. Twice!

I fear this may be an omen of things to come today. It had better not be.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Been There Done That

Yeah... I'm a 40 year old. I'm in my 40s. 10 years to 50. Based on the Centers for Disease Control's figures on life expectancy I can make a good bet as to there being fewer days ahead than behind. (Yes, Virginia, that is a Star Trek reference. I'm old but I haven't lost it completely yet.)

I celebrated my actual birthday in the manner I best saw fit. We celebrated mother's day. The two days coincided this year, and one is clearly more important than the other.

We picked up the kids in the morning and spent a couple of hours visiting my Mom, and then headed up North to visit Jen's Mom. We had a very fun day.

Now that the 40th birthday is behind me, I can go back to worrying about things that matter almost as little... like Hockey.

Patrice Bergeron is out with another concussion. How are the Bruins going to beat Tampa Bay without their best forward? They are calling it a mild concussion, which is good news... hopefully, but considering the severity of his first concussion I don't think any concussion is ever going to be mild for him.

Get well soon, Bergy, we need you!

Go Bruins!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Happy Mothers Day

Happy Mothers Day to all the Mothers out there everywhere. Even if you don't live in a place that celebrates Mothers Day you can use the US holiday as an excuse to have a great day. All of you Mothers everywhere deserve it!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

66 Minutes Left in My 30's


Dinner Party


Wait at the Bar


We are only 90 minutes early. Stupid rain.


My wife set up a birthday night out. We are at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse in Old City Hall in Boston. Everyone is coming.

This is going to be a fun night.

Thank you, Jen! I love you!

It's in Old City Hall... Who Knew?


Early for Dinner






As Barney Stinson Would Say...


Suit up!

Soda for Breakfast for Lunch


Breakfast for Lunch


The Kitty Show!

A somewhat boring episode of The Kitty Show.

YouTube Video


Time has caught me, my friends. (yes, I am paraphrasing Highlander)

Today is the last day that I can be referred to as a "thirty-something." Tomorrow the happiness that is Mother's Day will be slightly spoiled for me by the cosmic bummer that is my 40th birthday.

This sadness is mildly tempered by some happy news from last night. It's irrelevant happy news, in the grand scheme of things, but to me it's happy news none the less.

For the first time since 1992, the Boston Bruins have advanced to the Eastern Conference Finals. Welcome to round three.

They did what they failed to do last year by completing the sweep against Philadelphia, with a 5-1 win at the Garden last night.

Sure turning 40 is going to blow, but at least the Bruins are still playing.

Now if we could just get the Red Sox to stop sucking so bad.

Go Bruins!

Friday, May 6, 2011


We're a little less than 20 minutes from the dropping of the puck. Bruins/Flyers game four. The nerves are getting tense here at chez Ranchero. Even Patches the kitty cat is feeling it.

"Mrrrooooowwwww," she says.

Is it time to start praying to those hockey gods?

Don't give those damn Flyers even a sliver of hope. Kick them while they're down.


Go Bruins!

Paranoid Fear of Deja-Vu

Last year the Bruins won the first three games against Philadelphia. Remember that game when Marc Savard came back from the concussion and scored the winner in overtime? Was that awesome, or what?

Then the bubble burst and they committed the biggest choke in the history of professional athletics in North America, if not the world.

Fast forward one year and the Bruins have won the first three games against Philadelphia again. Remember when Krejci scored the winner in overtime? Was that awesome, or what?

Now tonight we come to game four... again. Last year we lost Krejci and Seidenberg to injuries. This year it's the Flyers have the big injury to Chris Pronger and they lack Simon Gagne who came back from injury in game four and sparked them in a big way.

Last year Tuukka Rask sort of ran out of steam for us in goal, while Leighton came alive in a big way for them. This year Tim Thomas is playing at the top of his game and getting better by the day, while Philly has been using almost two goalies a game, looking for some one to get the job done.

Everything looks good for us, except for the recent history. Why then, can I not relax and stop worrying about the recent history?

Because Deja-Vu is a bitch. Plain and simple.

Win it tonight.
Go Bruins.

Oh, and thanks NHL for moving the game between the two East coast teams to 8:00 so that you can squeeze a few more viewers out of Detroit. Thanks a piss pot.

Go Bruins

(oh, typos build character. If I misspelled a name it's because I am LAZY. That is all.)

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Double Rainbow

Say No to Deja Vu

The Bruins are up three games to none over Philadelphia in their second round playoff series.

I may have written those exact words last year. (I might actually check on that later)

I should be bouncing off the walls. I probably was bouncing off the walls at this point last year. Actually, I just looked back at what I wrote after game three last year and I was preaching cautious optimism because of what we saw the Red Sox do to the Yankees in 2004. So maybe I wasn't elated. I do know that I was seriously looking ahead to round three. I'm not doing that this year.


Pretty please.

Pretty please with sugar on top.

Do not push the feeling of deja-vu that Bruins nation is feeling any further than you already have. Win the game on Friday. Just get it over with. End the speculation. Exorcise the demons or whatever you want to call it. Just beat Philly in game four. Please, I beg you.

Say no to deja-vu.

Go Bruins!

For the Birds

This picture is from yesterday. Once again the neighborhood birds said thanks for the bird feeder. This time they thanked the blue car's windshield.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Game Three

The Bruins have a two games to none lead over the Flyers in this second round series.

They have a four to one lead after two periods in game three.

I should be bouncing off the walls with happiness but I'm not. Last year still hurts too much. I can't relax and enjoy this. When the Bruins score I get really excited for a few seconds and then the pain/fear/panic/suffering/(and worst of all)memory of last year come back and I feel that feeling that will probably someday be a sports-fan related ulcer.



(are any other Bruins fans feeling like this? Comments?)

Kid Night


Awkward turtles have have weird babies.

Who knew? (don't ask me to explain)

Random Thoughts

I had WBZ radio on this morning. As I turned it on they were wrapping up a story about fraudulent mortgages and forged signatures and illegal lending practices. Immediately following the story was an advertisement for mortgages.

I'm excited about the Bruins game tonight. I am also terrified. I should relax and just accept that the situation is totally different than last year. Last year we won the first two games at home. This year we won the first two games on the road. Big difference. Last year we had Tuukka Rask in goal. This year we have Tim The Man Thomas in net. No disrespect to Tuukka, but HUGE difference. Not to mention that Thomas in game two had what might be the best performance of his NHL career. See? It's not the same situation as last year at all. They are not going to blow a three games to none lead again. Right? Right? Is that the sound of chirping crickets I hear?

In further hockey news, Tampa Bay has a 3 games to none lead over Washington. I picked Tampa Bay to win, but like this? Do you think Washington can force a game seven the way Chicago did? Probably not (cough, CHOKE, cough)

May the Fourth Be With You.

The only down side to Star Wars Day 2011 is that four days from now I will have the saddest day ever. It's been 10 years since I had a day even remotely this depressing. You see, four days shy of 10 years ago I turned 30. Do the math, kiddies. Have you figured out why I really do not want May 8, 2011 to happen? I will be forty years old. I want Mother's Day to happen. I just don't want that other horrible thing to happen. You know what I mean?

Go Bruins

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Enough with the Overtime!

I almost didn't make it last night. If the Bruins game had gone six minutes longer I would have been out like a light. There's no way I was staying conscious through a second 18 minute overtime intermission.

Thankfully, Krejci scored at the 14:00 mark and the Bruins took game two of the series. That's puts us up two games to none, heading back home to Boston for games three and four.

Two games to none. If they win on Wednesday it will be three games to none. It's like deja-vu all over again. If they go up 3-0 on Philly, like they did last year before committing the greatest choke in professional sports history, I will be paralyzed with fear. Really. Not again, please... not again.

Of course if they win game three and then win game four I'll feel a little better.

Tim Thomas was a hockey god last night. No question. 52 saves. Philly got two goals early in the first and that was all Thomas was giving them. He was gigantic. He was huge. He was, The Man

Go Bruins!

Monday, May 2, 2011


I try to be a good person, and in my opinion a good person cannot take pleasure from the death of another person.

That being said... I think I'll make an exception in this case.

Osama bin Laden is dead.

I don't believe in capital punishment. If one person is evil enough to take another's life, how does it not make us equally evil for taking the criminal's life? Is that justice or is it revenge? I prefer to see the criminal live a long painful life suffering in a cage. That's just me though.

That being said... I think I'll make an exception in this case.

Does this make us safer? I don't know. Maybe. Probably not. Some one will step in to fill the vacuum. Who knows.

All I really want is for this to bring us one gigantic step closer to bringing our men and women in uniform home. That's the good that I want to see come from this. Bring 'em home.

Sunday, May 1, 2011


Yesterday the Bruins took game one of their second round series against Philadelphia.

Yesterday we had our first cookout in our new home using a new grill and a cool new outdoor fireplace thingie.

Today we found Forest Lake.

Today we found the Wheeler Dam in Salem.

Today we watched Hot Tub Time Machine.

Today the best thing that could possibly happen will happen, because the kids will be here. They are on the way home from the cruise they took with their Dad, Step-Mom, and Grandmother.

It's been a great weekend, and once they are back home it will be even better.

Forest Lake

My Location by Where I'm At!

This app should show that we are at Forest Lake in Methuen.  Just checking it out.

Click here to see where I am right now!

The street address is;
    10 Ridgewood Ln
    Massachusetts 01844

This message was created by Where I'm At on my iPhone.

Sent from my awesome iPhone 4!